Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Things I Have Learned About Driving in India

 

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In our first few days over here in India, we’ve been privy to some of the most exhilarating car rides I’ve ever been a part of. By exhilarating, I mean that we have actually almost had 3 head on collisions and we’ve stopped in front of oncoming traffic to take pictures while we were passing an ox drawn cart. We really believe that our driver could have some success back in the states, so we’re actively recruiting him for NASCAR. Here are a few of the tidbits we’ve learned from this expert:

  1. Lanes are merely a suggestion and should rarely be followed. Instead, find the best opening in the road to position you for massive future  acceleration.
  2. If you are behind a bus with 230 people in it, pass carefully. They always have the right away.
  3. If you are behind an elephant in the road, pass carefully. They always have the right away. Also, do not tailgate.
  4. Horns are by far the best means to communicate that you are on someone’s left, on someone’s right, are about to hit someone, are going to pass someone, are going to ram someone if they don’t let you pass, or that you are sorry for accidentally running into someone.
  5. If horns are not conveying your intent properly, resort to flipping your headlights at them.
  6. Motorcycles are by far the easiest way to get around. And they can safely transport a family of four. And they can transport 18 month old children.
  7. If you are not simultaneously pressing the gas and the break at some point during your drive, then you are doing it wrong.
  8. When encountering a traffic light which counts down until you can go, do not be a loser and wait for 0. Go at 5 at a minimum, 10 if you are feeling lucky.

Wish us luck for the next few weeks. I’ll have the unbridled joy of this little guy for every ride…

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4 comments:

Jim Holmes said...

Buses always have the right of way.

I was on a bus in Saudi Arabia that made a left turn across six lanes of traffic -- starting out from the right most lane.

Enjoy your trip!

Ayan dave said...

Hehe. Nice post. One more thing I would add.
People crossing the road have no right to the way. Honk at them and keep driving.

Man, I agree. It can be a thriller ride !

Mark Freeman (@m60freeman) said...

From my experience with Bangalore traffic in the 1990's, these rules can be more generalized as:

1) Yield to anything significantly larger than you
2) Ignore anything significantly smaller than you
3) Honk to indicate any recent, current, desired, or intended state change in relation to other vehicles or your own emotions; use of turn signals are optional
4) Any space as wide as you is at least temporarily to be considered a lane
5) Maintain the minimum possible distance between yourself and others at all times regardless of speed, both in front and on the sides
6) Allow waste disposal space behind animals
7) White lines painted on roadways are purely decorative
8) Yellow lines painted on roadways, traffic signs, and traffic lights are only significant if there is visible and audible oncoming traffic
9) Headlights are a secondary signalling device and are not to be used for routine driving at night
10) Vehicles may be filled to a capacity limited only by internal volume or external perching or hanging possibilities; the number of actual seats or hanging straps are irrelevant

Bramha Ghosh said...

We have a new guy on my team who just came over from India. I asked him how he was doing, and he answered "Here, when you walk out into the street, the cars stop."

I found it to be incredibly profound.